Since your state creates your story, anchors are vital for changing your state in order to change the story playing in your mind.
Here are some of my "go-to's, simply repeat these (or create your own) out loud or in your mind during times of heightened emotion:
"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up." ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:11
"The Lord will fight for you, just stay calm." ~ Exodus 14:14
"I thank you for the wonderful way that you have made me." ~ Psalms139:14
"I am strong and resilient"
"I am calm and confident"
"I am enough in this moment"
These are simple tools to use when you feel yourself entering a sympathetic (fight, flight, freeze) state. We communicate and connect at our best when we are in a regulated state, so give these a try throughout your day. Bonus: you will also improve your emotional flexibility to better handle future adversity.
- 4-5-6 breathing = inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 5 seconds, exhale for 6 seconds.
- Voo breathing = deep inhale, exhale to the deep sound of the word "voooooo".
- M-O-V-E = For a minimum of :90. Jump, Dance, Shake, Walk, Run etc. Any physical movement will process energy that will otherwise get stuck if ignored in an activated state.
- 20 second hug = hug self or another trusted person. Hug for :20 until you feel a release of tension. Say the above statements for added impact.
These books are some of my favorites and are available in hard copy or on Audible.
- Big Potential by Shawn Achor- How to unlock hidden sources of potential in ourselves and others. In a world that thrives on competition and individual achievement, we are measuring and pursuing potential all wrong. By pursuing success in isolation - pushing others away as we push ourselves too hard - we are not just limiting our potential, we are becoming more stressed and disconnected than ever.
- The 5 Second Rule by Mel Robbins- How to enrich your life and destroy doubt in five seconds. Mel Robbins will explain the power of a "push moment" and one simple tool you can use to become your greatest self.
- The High Five Habit by Mel Robbins - Take control of your life with one simple habit.